Random thoughts after 11.11.11

What can you say about this?

I don’t know if I have feelings for you, of if it is just lust.

If lust it is, then we may have a chance, I know you are not after the real thing.

But if it is about something else, I don’t think I can have a chance to make this right.

When we first met you treated me right, you even called me on my cell phone and said you wanted to talk to me, you invited me for a drink, we had a nice time talking.

Another day you took me to the movies, and I practically forced you to watch a chick-flick.

And even after that you kept talking to me, but not for so long.

Then you disappeared.

The thing is each time we met, we ended up together and I just let it flow, as you did. But I think that played against me because I was not playing hard to get.

I always find it had to play that game you boys love.

I could even mention a list of guys that ran away because I didn’t know how to play that game.

It’s sad because that seems to be the only way of having you, them or any other guy.

I’ve already told myself I would try to learn the rules, to play. But each time I end up losing.

I’m going nowhere like this, and I really like you. So it’s not only about lust after all.